shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
