I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
