No awkward lesbian experiences without me
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
