Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
