She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
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