Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
50% drunk capacity currently
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
