So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
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