I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
