i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
This baby is an asshole
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
