who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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