Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
