Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
this just has baby written all over it
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
