his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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