i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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