what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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