Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize