i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
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