You're completely useless in the revolution.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
