If that was your dad, he is hot
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
