If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
