she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I have post one night stand depression
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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