Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize