woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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