already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize