I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Apparently you make a good broom.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
