Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
