Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
