It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
She made me pour olive oil on her.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
