he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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