so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
