KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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