all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
