1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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