i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
