Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
