Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
