so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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