He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize