The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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