Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
