He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
