things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
