He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
