In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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