Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize