you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Randomize