I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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