I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
