real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
