i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
