Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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